Emmi Valve Fan Club

On tullut sairasteltua, joten päivitän jälleen tälläisellä vanhemmalla helmellä, joka muutoin jäisi maailmalta näkemättä. (…Kokonaisuudessaan. Facebook-ystäväni ovat ensimäistä sivua joskus ihailleet, mutta taisin jättää silloin mainitsematta, että itseasiassa tätäkin vitsiä sai venytetyksi neljän sivun mittaiseksi.) / I’ve been sick, so I post this treasure, that the world would mayotherwise  never see! (…Entirely. My Facebook-friends may have seen the first page, but I didn’t admitted to them, that actually there were a lots more of this stuff!)

“I want to be funny!” “No way! It’s our job!” / “We are like silly dogs!” “Unruly but adorable!” / “Then what are we?” “Well… Like..” / “Mystical mussels!” “I don’t want to! I wanna be funny!” / “Well, you can’t be everything.” “Oh, you be somekind of  ‘Mystical sea cucumber’ and well see how much fun that is!” / “Besides, everybody want’s to pet the puppy…” / ” …But nobody thinks that mussels are cute! “…and quite a few will be willing to eat them!” ” Except ‘Sometimes when hangovered, and with a pizza.’ ”

“I’ll become a dog too!” “Well it’s not that simple!” / “I mean… you don’t even know any tricks!” “Hey, don’t take this personally, but…” / “Those tricks of your’s are all sympathetic and everything…” ” ‘Stand.’ … ‘Find the ball.’ ” / “Nice. But not my thing. ” “Hmph!” “…Well now you got hurted.” / “All I’m saying is, that we don’t have to same kind of dogs!” “You’ll be that toilet-seat-wetting, eager, trick-dog…” / “…And  can be one of those small, feisty, lapdogs!” “Yeah, right!” “You just have to always steal the show, don’t you!” / And so:  “Let’s get some air…” “And I’ll give you a bone later!”

“That’s a cute furry thing you got there!” / “Don’t touch!” “Grrr!” / “Holy fuck! It bites!” / “You should never fondle Fifis you don’t know!” / “Hey! “No pulling!” / “Oh, that’s a playful little fella!” “Well yeah… It get’s excited like that sometimes.”

“Oh look at that, Spotty is all showing off! Look at him standing!” “Yeah. …Nice trick!” / “Hey, we could take these too out to play this evening!” / “Sure. Why not. At eight?” / “Be a good girl then, Fifi… remember what happened last time?” / “Hey, I’m done with that pooch of yours!” “Train it a bit, would you! It’s constantly all over me!” / “…Or then again…” “…Mybe we’ll hang out only with animal lovers from now on!” “But now we must go home! We’ll have nicely some time to give you a little trimming!” -Goofyed by Emmi Valve, 2011.

Kategoria: Luokittelematon.